Quest for Knowledge
As many of my friends know, I’m a researcher at heart. I inherited my probing nature from my parents who send articles and informational tidbits to me daily. I sift through articles, books and podcasts to educate myself to exhaustion on whatever topic is filling my overloaded head. I am definitely a podcast junkie and lately it feels as though I’ve listened to every podcast that falls into a category I’m exploring. My list of searched topics includes leadership, dating, divorce, cheating, adultery, narcissistic personality disorder, writing, parenting, travel advice, learning Italian, Greek mythology, trauma recovery, PTSD, nutrition, fitness, love, and procrastination, just to name a few. I’ve explored the obvious headliners like Lewis Howes, Rich Roll, Tim Farrell, Brené Brown, Oprah, and Joe Rogan and also delved into podcasts with less notoriety that I’ve discovered on my own or are hosted by friends. (shameless plugs for my friends will be at the end of my blog.) There are nuggets of information in each article, podcast or book I consume, but on some level, the philosophies imparted can give me pause as I question my ability to implement their teachings and function at my highest level as the gurus suggest.
Lately, the pool of podcasts has left me unmoved. Blah blah blah. The same old philosophies are preached over and over in a unique delivery. Yeah, yeah, heard it, seen it, tried it, know it. Understandably, the advice communicated by these motivational experts cannot ignite change without a hard commitment of oneself. On a scale of one to ten, my commitment to self-improvement, is about a 9.5, but I still struggle to activate the lessons learned on my quest for complete inner balance and career success. Even recognizing my admirable growth, I still feel like I’m falling short when watching the presentations by guys like Tony Robbins or Simon Sinek. Why can’t I easily achieve the successes they reference? Why am I not living a perfectly peaceful existence and exceeding my career expectations? I’ve committed to my wellness through yoga, marathons, triathlons, weight training, healthy eating, supplements, and various physical challenges. I’ve committed to my mental health though meditation, consulting with psychologists, and leaning on family and friends for support. I’ve committed to my personal growth through books, articles, retreats, and podcasts, yet somehow there always seems to be more to reconcile. Perhaps I’m setting my bar too high, expecting a version of myself that’s perfectionistic, which is entirely possible after surviving the wrath of a narcissist. Why can’t I create dramatic shifts like the renowned life coach’s? Ultimately, I believe the highly touted advice cannot replace looking inward for the answers, which ultimately is the only action that can move the needle.
While these wonderfully captivating educators can provide us with ideas, techniques and philosophies, we are living in a pandemic of unprecedented times where all normal parameters are irrelevant. Sometimes these advisors forget to say, ‘Hey, this is going to be tough. Expect these changes to feel painful. It's not going to feel good.’ Doing what’s right or what is best for us won’t feel easy or comfortable. Change is difficult and is designed to be challenging. Staring daunting life moments in the eye can be seen as an opportunity to step outside your comfort zone and reframe the situation, or more frequently, these moments can easily keep you stuck within the fear and routine that keeps you comfortable, yet stagnant.
What I’ve come to realize is information empowers us, but it can never replace your inner voice, your own gut of how to handle each individual situation that arises in your life. When I was in the depths of my healing, even the most insightful advice from the most acclaimed advisor couldn’t hasten my journey. There was no shortcut, no way to eliminate the discomfort of growth and change, and gathering information was helpful through the long process. I now understand I need to be my own guru, digesting and interpreting advice from others and reconfiguring it to work for me. We are each unique, and therefore one set program developed by someone who doesn’t know our story can’t possibly hold the answers. I know I won’t give up my voracious appetite for information, but I will be more forgiving towards myself, proceeding with the understanding that my path to success will always be uniquely my own.
Shameless plug for some friends:
1) BYLR with Jesse Itzler
2) Raise Your Game with Alan Stein Junior
3) The Business Brickyard Podcast with Howard Mann (Coming soon)